It’s too hard.
It’s too early.
I don’t have time.
I don’t care anymore.
I want something else.
I just want to give up.
The option to give up is always available.
We’ve all heard the saying, giving up isn’t an option.
Giving up is definitely an option and will always be an option. The question isn’t whether or not we can give up, because we know we can. The question is, do we want to give up? Do you want to give up? Are you ready to call it quits? To move on?
Do You Want To Give Up?
I’ve never enjoyed doing something that I was told I had to do. I’ve been this way since I was a kid. The thought of having to do something versus wanting to do something never quite sat well with me.
If I’m going to do something, it’s going to be because I want to do it and not because I have to do it.
I think it’s safe to say that no one likes the feeling of having to do something. Instead, we feel good when we want to do something and we do it because the choice is ours. We decide whether we do it or not, no one else.
We Make Our Choices, Then Our Choices Make Us.
Perhaps it’s a bit of rebellion we all have inside of us to go against the grain and not do as we’re told to do. Maybe it’s just me that feels that way. Maybe you do too.
I absolutely love all the work I do for The Wellness Bucket. Everything from the Motivational Monday Message video I put out every Monday, to the two blog posts I release every Tuesday and Thursday, to the newsletter that I send out to all our subscribers every Friday. The emails, comments, and requests for information that I receive daily that I absolutely love getting and responding to. The weekly calls, meetings, and late night strategy and writing sessions. It’s a lot of work, a lot of time, a lot of commitment, a lot of discipline, and definitely, a lot of sacrifice.
I sometimes think about what it would be like to not have to worry so much about getting all of this done on a daily and weekly basis. All the time I would have to myself, the more sleep I would get, the more time I would have to watch sports, especially with the upcoming football season. I know that at any moment, if I wanted to, I could give up. Call it quits, just like that. That’s my decision, my choice to make, and that feels really good to know. I do what I do because I want to do it, not because I have to do it.
We all do what we do because we want to do it and not because we have to do it.
Let’s talk through some examples to add more clarity to this idea.
CASE #1
If you’re current goal is to lose weight and you’re sacrificing getting up early in the morning to get in your workouts; if you’re sacrificing eating all the bad foods that taste so good such as pizza, pasta, burgers, fries, cupcakes; if you’re consciously taking control of your health and your wellness on a daily basis, you’re doing so because you want to, not because you have to. Even if you’ve gone to the doctor and were told you needed to lose weight for health purposes, that still doesn’t mean you have to do it. No one has to do anything. We do what we choose to do, not what we’re told to do.
CASE #2
If you’re starting a business and it’s taking all of your time and effort. If it has you stressed out, working long hours, sacrificing time with your family and friends. If it has you in a financial bind or crisis, remember that you’re doing it because you want to be doing it and not because you have to. You can give up whenever you decide to call it quits. The decision is yours. I understand there would be lots of consequences in doing so, but that’s not the point here. The point is regardless of the consequences, giving up has always been and will always been an option. It’s our own decision to make on whether or not to keep going or to call it quits.
CASE #3
If you’re in a relationship, whether dating, married, or a friendship that isn’t going well. You’re not as happy as you once use to be. You’re not communicating as you once did. You’re always arguing or you no longer do anything together as a couple or as friends. It’s our choice to remain in this current state. We/you are choosing to remain this way. I understand it’s a two way street in this scenario although we can only control our own actions and decisions, that’s it. You can give up and walk away, or you can make an effort to seek clarity, change things, and make them better. You do this because you want to do, not because you have to. You may be married, have kids, be heavily connected with houses, finances, and other assets. That still doesn’t mean you have to do anything you don’t want to do. The choice is and will always be yours. Call it quits or make the effort. Make a decision and commit to it.
CASE #4
You’re in a job or a career that makes you unhappy. You wake up every morning depressed knowing you have to go in to work again. You’re not happy, you’re unfulfilled, it’s effecting you physically, mentally, and emotionally. It’s beginning to also have a negative effect on the relationships you have with your family and friends. You have bills to pay and financial responsibilities to worry about so a steady income is a must. Definitely a tough predicament to be in. It also doesn’t mean it needs to remain this way. It’s up to you to decide when and if you’ve had enough. Giving up on such a job may be a difficult decision in the short term because of the financial implications it may have. In doing so though, it’ll put you on a path to physical and mental health, happiness, and fulfillment in the years to come.
CASE #5
Several years ago, I started a real estate rental company. I saw a good opportunity and went for it. The problem here was that my passion wasn’t in real estate or in the rental market. My passion is and has always been in health, fitness, and wellness. I invested heavily into this new real estate business but never quite could get into it. I wasn’t excited by it, it didn’t make me happy, I wasn’t fulfilled. My heart just wasn’t in it. I could have stayed with it and did my best to make it happen but I knew that it wasn’t where I wanted to be and doing what I wanted to be doing. Even though I had invested lots of money into it the business, it didn’t mean I had to continue on with it, especially since I knew it just wasn’t right for me. I didn’t have to stick with it and I didn’t. I decided the right decision for me was to call it quits and go back to doing what I loved doing.
“Giving Up Doesn’t Always Mean You Are Weak. Sometimes Is Just Means You Are Strong Enough To Let Go.”
Always do what you want to do.
Let your heart and happiness guide you.
Remember that there is nothing you have to do. Everything you’re doing is because you want to do it. I say this in a positive sense too, not a negative one. Positive in the sense where you’re doing what you’re doing by choice, and at any giving moment, if you decide to give up, change it, move in another direction, you can. It’s your choice and no one else’s.
It’s your life, your happiness, your decision.
Do what makes you happy.
What situations have you been in where you’ve had a decision to make on whether to give up or keep going? What did you decide and how did it turn out? I would love to hear your experiences if you’re willing to share them.
Featured Image Credit: Favim.com
Mike, if your going to do something you better have a good reason and make sure your sold on the idea yourself. That why I like The Wellness Bucket so much – it just feels like an extension of you.
I keep thrashing around looking for an idea or passion to guide me. I keep trying to sell myself that this is finally it. But it never is and I find it so painful. Some big block that keeps me from committing and taking actions. I always feel that this is it and try to pump myself up only to find myself fizzling a few days later.
I know its not quite on-topic, but thought I’d share:)
Hey John! Thanks so much for your comments and awesome words of support. I truly do appreciate it. It sounds to me like you’re doing all the right things, nothing just hasn’t clicked for you yet. The key words in I read in your statements were that you try and pump yourself up. When you find what you most excited and happy about and trust me, you will, you won’t need to try to pump yourself up because it will happen naturally. When you find what drives you and keeps you up at night with excitement, I assure you that your enthusiasm will not fizzle a few days later. Keep searching, keep experimenting, keep trying. You’re doing all the right things, you’re taking action which in itself, it awesome! It’s just a matter of time John. You’re awesome John I completely believe in you!
I had the hard decision of leaving my job… and it was so liberating to be out of that place. This was a very difficult decision, but afterwards, it provided me with a clear and more positive mind!
Thank you for another great post! It really is your decision on how your life continues.
Thanks for your comments Kristen! Leaving your job is never an easy decision to make so congrats to you! More often than not, it’s the toughest decisions to make that are the right decisions to make for our overall happiness, health, and success. You’re awesome!….. Keeping doing your thing, what makes you happy, and following your heart, it always knows best. 🙂
#4 is spot on…
I’ve been in that position for almost two decades. I had huge plans of going to medical school. Went to college, got straight A’s, etc. It was eventually a mountain of medical bills that put that dream on hold. Now, all these years later, my financial situation is worse, and I’m much further from that goal than I was 20 years ago.
I would love to leave the soul-sucking, miserable job, but as you said, you need to pay bills. My income has decreased by 50% since I started college 20 years ago. As the days pass, I lose more and more hope that I’ll ever see the time that I get to get back to pursuing the life I know I’m capable of, and not just living the life that poverty has put me in.
Maybe it’s time to “give up” on the majority of my hopes and dreams, and try and find something that cost’s no money. Though, I’ve gone so far down the alternate plans list, that there isn’t anything left on it that gets my heart singing…
Thanks for your comments Daniel and for sharing your past and present experiences with us. Although I do not know your entire situation or what your options may or may not be, I do know that whatever it is you’re wanting or looking for is certainly possible….not easy, not a quick fix, but possible. Whatever it may be that you want for yourself, for your health and happiness, start with one small step at a time, that’s it. Just one small step at a time, nothing less, noting more. Like I said, I do not know your situation in its entirety, although I do know the human spirit is capable or much more than we realize. I know you’ve gone far down the alternate plans list, but that’s definitely not the end of the road. You’ve just identified several options on that list that are not options getting you one step closer to what it is that does and will get your heart singing. Chances are it wouldn’t be an easy path Daniel but if the end goal is worth it, that’s reason enough to keep going and not giving up. All the best to you and please let me know how/if I may be able to help. Thanks for being part of this community, you’re awesome!