So tell me, what’s your story?
That’s right, your story… what’s your story?
We all have one, sometimes more than one.
I love a good story although those aren’t the kind of stories I’m referring to here.
I’m talking about the stories we tell ourselves about why we haven’t done something, how we’ll fail or look foolish if we try.
Stories of how we’re not good enough or smart enough to succeed, those stories.
Whether it’s with losing weight, running a race, a new relationship, starting a new career, starting a new business, writing a book… whatever it may be.
What’s Your Story?
Do you have stories that hold or have held you back from trying things you’ve always wanted to try but don’t because of those darn silly stories?
I know I have.
I use to think there was no way I could ever share my writing or videos let alone create an online business and community as I’ve done with The Wellness Bucket.
My story was, “I have no idea how the world of online works and if I try, I’ll fail miserably.“
Another story I use to have was about providing wellness coaching services.
My story use to be, “people are not going to want to work with me, especially virtually, to feel, look, and live their absolute best. There’s no way they’ll see value in what I offer and pay for such services.“
Although these stories still creep up occasionally, I’m happy to say I’ve nearly squashed all of them over the last 16 years, and even more so over the last 3 years.
We Are Defined By Our Stories And What We Believe To Be True
The key word there is “believe” to be true… not what actually is true.
What we believe to be true ends up being our truth…. good or bad.
My stories (my beliefs) kept me from pursuing work I love to do for years, the very work I am doing now, right here on The Wellness Bucket.
I recently finished 5 months of coaching with a wonderful couple who have two kids.
When we first started working together, their fear was that they could not and would not maintain a healthy lifestyle.
Their story was that even if they got on track for a little bit, they would eventually fall off because that’s what always happened to them.
This was their story and this is what they believed.
The very first thing we did when we started working together was we gave their old story the middle finger, waved goodbye to it, and created a new story with daily habits to support it, and we’ve never looked back.
Here’s a message I received from them as we finished up or coaching together…
“We know we have a ways to go on our health journey and we are committed to keep working at it. You have given us so many great tools and so much encouragement along the way, and we are so grateful to you! You have helped us change our life, and mostly, our story.”
Focus On Building The New Not Fixing The Old
I had another conversation with a friend who mentioned to me that he needs to let go of his limiting stories and beliefs because it’s holding him back.
I agree and disagree… let me explain.
When we focus on the stories we want or need to get rid of, or focus remains on the these stories.
It’s tough to get over them when that’s where our focus is.
Instead, I encouraged him to focus on his new story, what he can do and will do and have the focus be there, on the new stories instead of trying to get away from the old story.
“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”
Let Go
Let’s let go of stories that are no longer servicing us, that are holding us back and not allowing us to be and feel our best.
Let’s stop focusing on getting past the past and start focusing on building the present, the here, the now.
You’re awesome and deserve nothing less than to feel your absolute best and there is no silly story that we’re going to allow to hold you back – no way. I’m not having it.
In fact, if you’re comfortable doing so, let me know what your story is in the comments below, the story that’s been holding you back from doing, having, and creating what you want.
Share it with me and together, we’ll give it the ole middle finger, squash it, and begin focusing on your new story, on building the new and no longer fighting the old.
And if you don’t have that new story yet, no worries at all.
Let me know that too, I promise to help.
Thanks for being here.
You’re awesome!
Mike
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Hey Mike. Deep down I always thought I could do anything. But, the nay-sayers’ input always had me backing down and not doing it for fear of “what if what so-and-so said is true, my idea will never work?”. I remember once when a nay-sayer doubted me and I did what I wanted anyway but failed just like the nay-sayer said. When the person found out it did not work out, they grinned and were like, “see I told you…” It froze me and really brought me to self-doubt myself with many things. How sad and ridiculous of me to allow that…. Today, I am working through it and do not listen to what the doubters have to say.
Hi Erin! Thanks for your comment 🙂 You’re awesome and I appreciate it. Good for you for working through it and not listening to the doubters and nay-sayers. They will always be there, and that’s just fine because we don’t have to listen to a word they say. By taking action (whether you fail or succeed) on anything versus playing it safe and doing nothing like your doubters are doing, you will always be a winner regards of the outcome and regards of the “I told you so” comments. Reminders me of “The Man in The Arena” speech by Theodore Roosevelt where he says… “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” You’re awesome Erin… keep taking action and doing your thing 🙂 Cheers!